Free to be ME!

Since the first part of the year, I've been participating in a Woman's Bible Study at church studying "Radically Obedient" by Ailene Thompson. Super cool to have the person who wrote the study to lead in person a common time of sharing. Then, we break out into small clusters of women to dig deeper into the scripture. GREAT study, and would highly recommend it to anyone.

Tonight during Ailene's part, she was talking about being free to be yourself. Free.to.be.me.... four little liberating words! And, it seriously got me to thinking about who do I *pretend* to be in different situations and scenarios? How hard do I try to fit *in* with those groups/situations that aren't part of the group who know the REAL me? And, even more importantly, after you peel back all the layers, who is the *real* me?

Feeling accepted has been important to me for as long as I can remember. I long to be accepted, loved, feel part of the group. It's something I've struggled with since I was in 6th grade and went to live with my mom for a year and was the *new* kid in school and was picked on. Add to that being part of the invisible crowd at a small high school. I bloomed in college and finally felt comfortable being around others.

Subconsciously, I still feel like the kid who longs to be accepted and liked...but God created me uniquely. And, as a daughter of the King (a genuine princess!)I KNOW that I have nothing to worry about.

But, that voice of fear and doubt sinks in and *tells* me how *they'd* like me to be.

Most importantly, I'm ready to toss this vision of *perfect* that I have aside and be the imperfect, sinful, redeemed and loved all the same woman that God calls me to be. I want to learn to be comfortable in my own skin, in all situations, without worry or fear or self-doubt standing in my way. By the grace of God, I'm free to be ME!

....and, this knowledge that I'm free to be me helped me to lay aside pride and fear and share with the women something that's been laying HEAVILY on me. And, I shared this innermost part of myself, and it was met without judgment, with love,and with grace.